As if the concept...

...wasn't enough to sell this movie... Once you throw in Lorenzo Lamas and Debbie Gibson...



C'mon kids! This definitely calls for a viewing party!

Finally, a real reason to study physics...

Face it, you've all wanted to try something like this...

It takes all kinds of people...

This "ad" first skittered across my desk a couple of weeks ago, and at the time I simply wrote it off as "obviously some kind of fake"... Well, yeah, it is, but it's also gotten enough attention that NPR ran a feature yesterday on its creators... And, it really is kind of funny, so...

Torchin' Up the Radio Waves...

Fans of Torchwood and fans of old time radio drama have reason to come together this week as, in anticipation of next week's five day Torchwood blowout, the BEEB has announced three new radio plays that will run Wednesday through Friday this week on BBC Radio 4...

Starring John Barrowman, Eve Myles and Gareth David-Lloydthe 45 minute plays will be transmitted at 2.15pm on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Once transmitted they can be downloaded from the BBC iPlayer for a period of 1 week.

American fans, it does appear that we will be able to listen to these shows onlline - here is the BBC Radio 4 website...

Here's the lineup for the shows:

Asylum Wednesday, July 1, 2009:
When PC Andy arrests a teenager for shoplifting, he thinks it is going to be a routine case. Then he sees the weapon she is carrying and decides to call in the Torchwood team. Under questioning from Gwen, the girl remembers her name but little else, and when she speaks it is in a strange mix of English and Scandinavian, but with a Cardiff accent. Then the girl's blood tests come through and the team is faced with a dilemma.

Golden Age Thursday, July 2, 2009
The Torchwood team are led to Delhi on the trail of a dangerous energy field. As the field grows, they witness the simultaneous disappearance of hundreds of people. Jack discovers that the field centres on an old colonial mansion, Torchwood India.

Shocked to find that Torchwood India is still going strong after he shut it down himself over 80 years ago, he is even more surprised to find that its members, including his old flame the Duchess, haven't aged a day.

The Dead Line Friday July 3, 2009
When a Cardiff hospital is inundated with patients who have fallen into coma -like trances, Torchwood move in to investigate. The trances appear to have been triggered by phone calls, all received on retro phones and made from a number that hadn't been active for over 30 years. Determined to find out who has been calling the unfortunate victims, Jack rings the mysterious number, but the line is dead. But then it calls Jack back.

It's like a poker game...

...where my absolute love for Lewis Black trumps my hatred of the new G4 and what it has become...



Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta go finish writing my new country opus "I was talking to the Jesus in my pancakes 'til you poured syrup up his nose"...

The Junkyard - A magnificent melange of moderately magnificent memos meant to melt your marrow and mend your melancholy mind

Some folks call it "linkblogging", we just call it "The Junkyard"... What is it? Basically an every-once-in-a-while collection of those items I've run across that don't necessarily need a full write-up or maybe just little bits that I find amusing or quirky or.... Anyway, just follow the links in each item for more info... You get the idea... anyway, enough preamble, on with the show...

ITEM! A good friend and I are always trying to figure out what it takes to get those big government grants... Here's someone who's obviously gotten to the bottom of the issue...

ITEM! It's the Oprah High School: You get to be valedictorian! And you get to be valedictorian! And you get to be valedictorian! As a matter of fact everybody in today's audience gets to be valedictorian...

ITEM! At least we have Pat Buchanan around to help us lern how two spel hipocrasie...

ITEM! What does it take to be a TRUE hero? I'd say 25 gallons qualifies..

ITEM! I don't care if she is a pageant winner... she's still a real dog...

ITEM! First it was the bees disappearing, now it's the WASPs...

ITEM! From the "I Really Want To Be Offended" file: Racist robots in disguise...

ITEM! At least there's one Supreme Court Justice who thinks strip-searching a 13 year old girl who might be hiding an Advil is a reasonable thing...

ITEM! Perhaps the most relevant quote to come out about Thursday's deaths: “These people were on our lunchboxes. This is the moment when Generation X realizes they’re grown up.”

ITEM! You may think there's something wrong about Fox News lying to you, but not according to a Florida Court of Appeals...

LAST ITEM! Honestly, this is a topic I'm planning to visit more in-depth in the upcoming weeks, but here's one small take on how the Obama administration is starting to look more and more like Bush Light (and unfortunately i ain't talking beer)...

The wait is almost over...

Torchwood fans rejoice... The BBC has finally made it official... The new "series" of Torchwood (actually a 5 night miniseries shown on consecutive evenings will begin Monday, July 6th... And with the announcement they've also released a new trailer:



Now if we could just get confirmation on the date for the next Dr Who special... Or of that rumor that's floating around about the Children In Need special...

It's not that easy being green...

...ok, but seriously, how perfect can you be for a role when someone can edit together existing footage of you playing other parts and come up with a trailer as good as this? (Actually it is an incredibly masterful editing job...) Somebody PLEASE make this movie happen...



Oh, and if you haven't been checking out Nathan's show Castle on NBC then do yourself a favor and go to their website or hulu and get caught up... It's a fun little detective show with some of the smartest writing on the network. It may not be groundbreaking, but it's an enjoyable way to pass an hour or so... And unlike 24 or C.S.I. Paducah (or wherever they've set the latest one) I don't feel like I need a shower after watching it just to get the grime off...

Who can turn the world on with her.... smile?

(Yeah, I know, Hannah, the eight year old super Mary Tyler Moore fan in the family will probably be mad at me for that one, but hey, sometimes they're just too good to resist, y'know?)

Was it the smile?

Was it the hair?

Was it the fact that she was a beautiful woman who absolutely refused to wear a bra no matter the circumstances?

Whatever it was, you can have your Clara Bows, your Betty Grables, your Whoever You'd Like to Name, for my generation, when we were reaching pubescence, Farrah was THE "It Girl"... And in some ways she always will be...

Of course, everyone has to start somewhere, and for Farrah, the start was commercials... specifically, commercials for Ultra-Brite toothpaste:



hmm... maybe it was the smile... Or maybe she was simply a unique beautywho hit the right notes for the right time... whatever the case, Farrah, you will be missed...

(BTW: "excit'ning"?... whew, talk about stretching for a rhyme...)

There's wrong...

...and then there's Really Really wrong...

Now, some of you will remember this song from its heyday... some of you might remember the Grateful Dead performing it...but I'm willing to bet very few of you remember this particular version of what host Lawrence Welk calls at the end a "modern spiritual"...



Oh, and btw, is it just me, or do you get the feeling that Myron Floren, who is introducng the piece knows that "something" is wrong but is afraid to say anything to the boss?

He's the Shat...

In order to keep this from just being a series of obituaries to start things out, how about if we intersperse a few other items in and amongst the rememberences?

It won't take long hanging around here to know that if I have one true hero, then that is the man who has become mythical in his own mind... he is a hero to many, idolised as a master thespian and even more admired for his storytelling and creative skills... a man truly unique in his skills at self deprecating self promotion... Of course I could only be describing one man...

Stan Lee.

After "The Man", however, there can be only one man who even comes close to fulfilling those same ideals, and that man is the one, the only, the true Shat, Mr. William Shatner...

So, besides not appearing in JJ Abrams Star Trek re-imagining and putting in a seemingly terrified performance on Million-Dollar Password this past week (seriously, remind me to dig up a clip, the man appears absolutely scared shatless every time he is trying to think of a word)? Well, apparently he is the director and creative force behind a new you-tube exclusive cartoon called "The Gavones"... As he explained to People Magazine,

"It's the mafia in Hollywood trying to make a hit – and half the family think it's murder and the other half thinks it's a movie... It's a comedic Soprano family." In the pilot, Shatner used friends and family to voice the characters. Down the line, Shatner says that Robert DeNiro, Joe Pesci and Martin Scorsese are likely to appear – their cartoon likenesses, anyway...

"We can get anybody we want with the flick [of a pen]..."

Want to check out the first episode? Your wish is our command Memsahib...



For more info on the Shat's Gavones (yeah, i know, it soounds somehow vaguely dirty to me, too...) check out the official youtube page here...

Ed and the Superheroes...

A lot had been made over the past few days of Ed McMahon's unique relationship with Johnny Carson, and it's true that there was a certain symbiosis between the two that cannot be denied... And of course, he was also known as the ultimate pitchman... from Alpo to Budweiser to American Family Publishers (no, NOT Publisher's Clearing House) if Ed said it was a good product or made a promise that he would show up at your door with a check, you knew that you could take the man's word for it... Another aspect of the man's career was his hosting duties... From Star Search to the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade to co-hosting the Jerry Lewis Labor Day Telethon, McMahon proved he was able to carry a show on his own and was not necessarily "just a sidekick"... He even had a minor film career, with roles in films a diverse as Fun with Dick and Jane and Butterfly...

However there was one tv spot that... well, I suppose it falls under the category of "hosting duties", but it was definitely (and most would say fortunately) a one-time gig... In 1979, Wonder Woman was having television success on CBS and Superman was headed for the big screen, so ABC decided it was time to bring it's own brand of superheroes back to the small screen... Therefore, they came up with the concept of "The Legends of the Superheroes"... After all, if one hero was good, well... the more the merrier, right? After recruiting Adam West, Burt Ward, and Frank Gorshin to reprise their roles from the Batman TV show, ABC filled the other hero and villain slots with "stars" such as Charlie Callas, Ruth Buzzi, William Schallert and Barbara Joyce...
'
There were actually two "Legends of the Superheroes" specials produced... The first, called "The Challenge" was a relatively straightforward "adventure"... Here's how wikipedia sums up the plot:

In the first episode, the Justice League of America (Batman, Robin, Flash, Green Lantern, Hawkman, Captain Marvel, Huntress and Black Canary) reunite on the Batcave to celebrate elderly retired superhero Crimson Cyclone's birthday. The party is interrupted by the Legion of Doom (Riddler, Weather Wizard, Sinestro, Mordru, Dr. Sivana, Giganta and Solomon Grundy), who announce they spread deadly bombs on several places, and the heroes must follow clues to find them. It's all, actually, a trap to make the heroes drink Mordru's de-powering potion, which succeeds, but the heroes face off the villains even so, disarm the bombs and recover their powers. Only after the whole battle is gone, and the heroes have retrieved, that Crymson Cyclone arrives to give his aid.

All in all, taken in the camp spirit it was offered, the show is... well, actually it's still pretty bad, though there are laughs to be had... if you care to check it out for yourself, the whole thing is available on youtube, beginning with part one here...

It's the second special that we're more concerned with today... because instead of presenting another superhero adventure, for their second special, ABC decided to present a roast of the heroes... Yep, you read that right, a roast... think of the old Dean Martin Roasts, except everyone is dressed as a superhero or villain... and (surely by now you see where this is going)... the whole thing was overseen by roastmaster and host Ed McMahon... I haven't been able to find the entire show online, but the clip below is fairly typical and shows a good bit of interaction between Ed and surprise roaster Dr. Sivana...



Obviously, despite the sheer ludicrousness of the situation, Mr McMahon is giving the role his all, just as he did whatever he was confronted with... which is why he should be remembered as more than just a sidekick, more than just (to keep with the theme) Robin to Mr. Carson's Batman, but an actor and a fine human being in his own right...

What a week...

...I'm really starting to wonder if I didn't pick the wrong week to come back to blogging... Certainly there's no shortage of topics to write about... Ed, Farrah, Michael... The riots in Iran, Mark Sanford cultivating chilis in Argentina... Health care reform, wealth care reform...

Still, here we are, so I suppose we might as well dive right in...